It took 18 years

I could write for hours on the backstory to Marks divorce. I will keep it simple. He was married very briefly before he married me and fathered a child with his ex wife. The ex wife left Mark, took their child, and moved back to Wisconsin. Appropriate legal papers were filed and life went on. Easy and smooth right? Guess again! What no one could have predicted was that his ex wife slowly unraveled over the years. She went from job to job (fired from each one for various reasons) and husband to husband (she is currently on number four!). She even moved to another country then moved back after 9 months. Through all of this, she dragged their daughter - and made life for us and for her daughter as stressful as she possibly could. Every visitation was a battle. Every phone call Mark made to their daughter was a struggle. Nothing was easy. Ever. But then nothing is easy when you are dealing with someone who has a borderline personality disorder.
But we are finished now. Their daughter is 18, she has graduated high school, and the issue of college is a moot point. It has only been a few days since the 'final' hurdle was jumped, but what a difference it has made in our home. We are not waiting for that other shoe to drop. We don't wait to see what new papers are going to be delivered to our attorneys office (we've had one on retainer for 17 years!). We can live our lives in peace now. No stress. Just calm. It is a glorious feeling and I am reveling in it.
But I am also sad. Sad that Mark and his daughter were cheated out of a good relationship. Sad that Marks daughter does not feel that she can have an open relationship with Mark and our family for fear of her mother going on a three day rant. I am sad that this child has had to have a parade of men in her life, each one being set up as 'dad' only to have him kicked out when her mother was done with them. She has had three 'dads' ripped out of her life, and that makes me sad for her. But I am a woman of Faith, and I believe that someday, somehow it will all come right again.
What makes me most happy is that I can open up this blog again and keep our family and friends up to date on our goings on - complete with pictures and commentary - without fear of it being turned into a court exhibit (yes, that happened!).
So, here is to the start of a new 'normal' for our family! A happy, stress free normal!

Hugs to you all,

Jaye