Sometimes I need to vent in a safe place with friends and family who understand. So sometimes, this blog is about me getting things off my chest. Comment if you want as this blog is private and the people mentioned in this blog are unable to access it! :) So here goes....hang on to your seats!
Mark hasn't spoken to Shelby in almost a year. It's not that he hasn't been trying! 17 phone calls with messages left on the machine or with Mary to have Shelby call back. Numerous emails. Texts. Letters. All gone unanswered. Not a word. And now, a few weeks ago, Mary actually had the guts to RETURN a letter that we wrote! We addressed it to 'Shelby Greene' (keep in mind, the courts have ruled TWICE now that we can use either Shelby Greene- her birth name OR Shelby Knispel-Greene...the name Mary wanted to change her name to) and Mary wrote across the letter 'NO PERSON BY THIS NAME LIVES AT THIS HOUSE'. Now she has no problem with using just 'Knispel' for Shelbys last name (Marys maiden name) which is in DIRECT VIOLATION of the court order. But God forbid we use 'Greene' (Shelbys birth name and LEGAL NAME!). We've tried. Countless times. So now, with Marys blatant thumbing her nose at the court order, we have no choice. We are having to take her in for contempt (she's already been in contempt five times!) again, in an effort to get her to smarten up and once again put Mark in contact with Shelby. We know that the court system is screwed up. At most, Mary will get yet another fine and a 'stern talking to' (Like she even cares!) but it DOES get her to smarten up for a bit.
We know that with her going through her third divorce her life is in turmoil again. She isn't getting what she wants from her soon to be third ex (she wants the house they built without having to compensate him for it. They both owned homes and they both put the profits from said homes into this new house and were only married 2 years!) so she is on her usual spiral. She is making his life hell but can't get through to him in a way that really affects him (he no longer will speak to her other than through his atty) so the only OTHER way she can 'vent' is to play games with Mark and Shelbys relationship. The sad thing is, it doesn't bother us at all, but Shelby is the one who pays the price for her mothers complete insanity. Shelby will be with us at Christmas this year (due to Marks crazy sea schedule this year, she had to miss her spring break with us as well as her summer visit) and it will be an opportunity for Mark and Shelby to reconnect. I am detached. I could care less at this point. sigh...
I am so tired of this. Tired of Mary getting away with having broken EVERY SINGLE order ever issued and US having to foot the bill to enforce them. If Mark had ever missed ONE CENT of child support, the state would go after him at NO COST to Mary and get the money, but she can violate court order after court order and WE pay for it.
On the bright side, we only have 2 years and 11 more months of dealing with Mary! but who's counting.......
Hugs to all,
Jaye
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Sam Graduates!
It seems like just yesterday when I was being life flighted into the city to give birth to my 8 week premature baby boy. He was 4lbs 4 ounces...but a fighter right from the get go. After only two weeks in the hospital (still 6 weeks premature) he was able to come home, and he gained a pound a week for the next 8 weeks. He still eats enough to fortify a small army, but fortunately, the pound a week tradition is no longer! :) Now that little four pounder is a grown boy....quickly turning into such a wonderful, funny, kind, genuine man. We are SO proud of Sam....SO. PROUD.
Sam and I just before he headed to the venue. "Mom, I don't have time for a picture!"..."C'mon Sam, just ONE!"...and look who won THAT battle! :) Moms rock!
Ben in the car on the way to Grad. Not too sure about the whole thing. All he knows is he had to dress up....
The auditorium where Grad was held. 400 graduates. 7 tickets each. YOU do the math!
Paige and Ben waiting for the Ceremony to start....
Sam coming out of the auditorium after the ceremony...he's so cute!
Sams 'posse'. The greatest group of guys you ever want to know. Sam made GREAT choices in friends and we've never had any trouble with this group (that we know of! hehe)
Sam and Mommy after the ceremony!
Sam just LOVES his siblings!
Sams Dad flew in for Grad...
Sam and one of his best buds, Skylar. Great guys....
Sam and his gorgeously funny girlfriend Dani....
Hugs to all,
Jaye
Sam and I just before he headed to the venue. "Mom, I don't have time for a picture!"..."C'mon Sam, just ONE!"...and look who won THAT battle! :) Moms rock!
Ben in the car on the way to Grad. Not too sure about the whole thing. All he knows is he had to dress up....
The auditorium where Grad was held. 400 graduates. 7 tickets each. YOU do the math!
Paige and Ben waiting for the Ceremony to start....
Sam coming out of the auditorium after the ceremony...he's so cute!
Sams 'posse'. The greatest group of guys you ever want to know. Sam made GREAT choices in friends and we've never had any trouble with this group (that we know of! hehe)
Sam and Mommy after the ceremony!
Sam just LOVES his siblings!
Sams Dad flew in for Grad...
Sam and one of his best buds, Skylar. Great guys....
Sam and his gorgeously funny girlfriend Dani....
Hugs to all,
Jaye
Saturday, June 20, 2009
I have been remiss...my apologies!
I have been so busy this past month that I really haven't been able to find time to post on the blog like I'd like to...so this weekend I plan on some massive catching up! The first exciting thing that happened was that after 109 days out to sea, Mark came home! WHEEE......
This company had a special for military families whereby you could order these banners for the cost of shipping! I had this one made for Marks homecoming...I wrote the dates of his mission on the back and we will write all his mission dates on it. A nice souvenir for when he retires (July of 2010!!)
Mark got home on a Friday morning and by Friday afternoon the kids had him convinced to go to the lake and swim and play boccie. They LOVE that game!
Saturday morning Paige conned him into fixing her breakfast...I was LOVING this new routine!
Can you tell that Ben really missed his Daddy?
After Breakfast it was off to Scenic Beach for the afternoon.....nice and relaxing...
This has got to be the BEST t shirt ever! Oh..and Marks not bad either! For the record, I am the 'real woman' on this t shirt in case any of you were wondering!!
Sunday found us at Point No Point Beach for the day....what a weekend..felt like being on a tropical vacation! Paige was busy digging in the sand.
Mark and the kids playing in the water...as if Mark didn't get enough of the sea!
Of course we had to have ice cream down on the beach...yummy..
Lighthouse at Point No Point...
The view from the beach of Mount Rainier.....what a paradise we live in!!
Hugs to all,
Jaye
This company had a special for military families whereby you could order these banners for the cost of shipping! I had this one made for Marks homecoming...I wrote the dates of his mission on the back and we will write all his mission dates on it. A nice souvenir for when he retires (July of 2010!!)
Mark got home on a Friday morning and by Friday afternoon the kids had him convinced to go to the lake and swim and play boccie. They LOVE that game!
Saturday morning Paige conned him into fixing her breakfast...I was LOVING this new routine!
Can you tell that Ben really missed his Daddy?
After Breakfast it was off to Scenic Beach for the afternoon.....nice and relaxing...
This has got to be the BEST t shirt ever! Oh..and Marks not bad either! For the record, I am the 'real woman' on this t shirt in case any of you were wondering!!
Sunday found us at Point No Point Beach for the day....what a weekend..felt like being on a tropical vacation! Paige was busy digging in the sand.
Mark and the kids playing in the water...as if Mark didn't get enough of the sea!
Of course we had to have ice cream down on the beach...yummy..
Lighthouse at Point No Point...
The view from the beach of Mount Rainier.....what a paradise we live in!!
Hugs to all,
Jaye
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Thanks??
Yesterday we found out that Ben has FOR SURE made it into the same private school gifted program that Paige is in! It is a bit of a story so I'll condense it...or not....lol
Ben was tested a few months ago and 'missed' the cut off to get in by ONE POINT. Now I am not one of those mothers who thinks the sun rises and sets out of their kids ass (ok..but only sometimes!) but I DO know my kids better than any 'test result' and I KNEW he should be in this program. The school district results DID say 'Your child is gifted and we are offering him 'gifted services' at his present school '. Now this letter was confusing to me because it looked EXACTLY like the acceptance letter we got when Paige was accepted. So we THOUGHT he'd made it in...but he hadn't...glad I read that FINE PRINT! Anyways... not too sure we liked that but I kept an open mind. I made an appt with the school principal and the 'special services' teacher (I use that word loosely as she teaches 5th grade full time and vaguely monitors the 'gifted kids' in the school....). I sat in that office for a half hour while they tried to 'sell me' on their version of gifted services. Ben could join DI (Destination Imagination a science based 'club') and Math Olympiad after school. I said 'thats nice, but neither one are GIFTED programs. Any child can take them'. Well, then I was told Ben could work on his own on a new math program on the computer. Uh..he is SEVEN. Work on his OWN on a COMPUTER? Yah..he'll spend his time on nick jr or some such site! lol...I finally told them to just stop. That the district MANDATES that they provide gifted children in the school with a special program in conjunction with their regular classes and that I did NOT want Ben to merely get 'extra work' but wanted him to be challenged and motivated. I said "If I have to, I will be in his class every day to make sure he is getting what you are mandated by the district to provide'. You could see the two of them visibly cringe. I was their 'oh crap' parent! :) ( I LOVE being the oh crap parent!).
So..I realized that THIS solution was NOT going to be in Bens best interests. I called the school district and met with the Special Services Co-Ordinator and asked how I go about filing an appeal. She explained the whole process and gave me some really good pointers... so I filed an appeal with the school district who required a report from me as well as from Bens teacher. Bens teachers report was beyond words. I asked her 'is this MY child you are writing about?' lol....and MY report ran to four pages (imagine me being wordy!). I submitted it and was told that it would be reviewed and if it held merit they would consider re-testing Ben in the fall for admittance into the program NEXT year (2010/2011 school year). We waited a week and got a letter saying 'we've reviewed your appeal and feel Ben needs to be re tested for THIS YEAR'! WHEEEEE....I felt good vibes!! So Ben went for another test, this time not with ALL the 'flagged as possibly gifted kids' like the first test but an individual test. This test was also different in that while the first one focused on getting the right answers etc, this NEW test focussed on HOW he learns, HOW he gets the anwer..and they don't care if the answer is wrong, they want to see his thought processes...which for gifted children is FAR different than us regular learners! We waited two weeks.....and Tuesday morning got a phone call (a letter arrived yesterday) saying 'Ben tested OFF the charts! We would REALLY like him to be in the program! Do you want to accept this spot for him?" After all I'd been through, I was tempted for a brief moment to say 'uhhh...nahhhh it's ok'! Ahahahaha....Of course we accepted!! This is going to be a GREAT education for Ben (paid for by the district I might add!) as he is bored beyond belief with 'regular' school. Paige was in the public school system up to and including 3rd grade and she too was bored out of her mind. NOW she is challenged and using her brain and LOVING school (she is in 4th grade, but skipped 4th and 5th grade math..is doing college entrance spelling tests etc). Bens teacher (who also taught Paige for 1st and 2nd grade) said that while she thought Paige was smart and gifted, she sees even MORE of that in Ben.
So now you know the story..let me get to the title of my blog (at long last right? lol). I had someone say to me after I'd told them Ben had also gotten into this program "Hey Congrats! Way to Go! You and Mark have done a great job!". And while I said 'Thanks!' I had mixed feelings...yes, we DO do a great job of parenting (I think! lol)...we are involved with our kids, we go to all their 'events', we take them everywhere and talk to them like intelligent people (we've never 'dumbed' down our language for them)...also, there is a great gene pool to work with. Marks side of the family has most of the kids in gifted programs or advanced programs. Mark is brilliant himself. My brother is a bona fide genius. I mean REALLY..a REAL genuis. And while my biological father is a whole other story, he too I believe has 'giftedness' in his brain. So our kids also came from a great gene pool that apparently gets pretty deep when Mark and I mix those genes! lolol...
But I also thought to myself.....it really isn't ME...or MARK...after all, we have three other kids between us who while EXTREMELY smart and talented, aren't 'gifted'. I think it was just a good combination of Mark and I and a family history of good smart genes and a whole host of other small things that all added up let us hit the genetic crap shoot twice...So while I'd LIKE to take the credit..I only carried them in my body..I've only helped to raise them. God made them. He connected all their dots and made them who they are. Mark and I have merely been blessed to have them on loan for awhile.
But I'm am still darn proud....even if the sun DOESN'T really rise and set out of their asses! :)
Hugs to all,
Jaye
Ben was tested a few months ago and 'missed' the cut off to get in by ONE POINT. Now I am not one of those mothers who thinks the sun rises and sets out of their kids ass (ok..but only sometimes!) but I DO know my kids better than any 'test result' and I KNEW he should be in this program. The school district results DID say 'Your child is gifted and we are offering him 'gifted services' at his present school '. Now this letter was confusing to me because it looked EXACTLY like the acceptance letter we got when Paige was accepted. So we THOUGHT he'd made it in...but he hadn't...glad I read that FINE PRINT! Anyways... not too sure we liked that but I kept an open mind. I made an appt with the school principal and the 'special services' teacher (I use that word loosely as she teaches 5th grade full time and vaguely monitors the 'gifted kids' in the school....). I sat in that office for a half hour while they tried to 'sell me' on their version of gifted services. Ben could join DI (Destination Imagination a science based 'club') and Math Olympiad after school. I said 'thats nice, but neither one are GIFTED programs. Any child can take them'. Well, then I was told Ben could work on his own on a new math program on the computer. Uh..he is SEVEN. Work on his OWN on a COMPUTER? Yah..he'll spend his time on nick jr or some such site! lol...I finally told them to just stop. That the district MANDATES that they provide gifted children in the school with a special program in conjunction with their regular classes and that I did NOT want Ben to merely get 'extra work' but wanted him to be challenged and motivated. I said "If I have to, I will be in his class every day to make sure he is getting what you are mandated by the district to provide'. You could see the two of them visibly cringe. I was their 'oh crap' parent! :) ( I LOVE being the oh crap parent!).
So..I realized that THIS solution was NOT going to be in Bens best interests. I called the school district and met with the Special Services Co-Ordinator and asked how I go about filing an appeal. She explained the whole process and gave me some really good pointers... so I filed an appeal with the school district who required a report from me as well as from Bens teacher. Bens teachers report was beyond words. I asked her 'is this MY child you are writing about?' lol....and MY report ran to four pages (imagine me being wordy!). I submitted it and was told that it would be reviewed and if it held merit they would consider re-testing Ben in the fall for admittance into the program NEXT year (2010/2011 school year). We waited a week and got a letter saying 'we've reviewed your appeal and feel Ben needs to be re tested for THIS YEAR'! WHEEEEE....I felt good vibes!! So Ben went for another test, this time not with ALL the 'flagged as possibly gifted kids' like the first test but an individual test. This test was also different in that while the first one focused on getting the right answers etc, this NEW test focussed on HOW he learns, HOW he gets the anwer..and they don't care if the answer is wrong, they want to see his thought processes...which for gifted children is FAR different than us regular learners! We waited two weeks.....and Tuesday morning got a phone call (a letter arrived yesterday) saying 'Ben tested OFF the charts! We would REALLY like him to be in the program! Do you want to accept this spot for him?" After all I'd been through, I was tempted for a brief moment to say 'uhhh...nahhhh it's ok'! Ahahahaha....Of course we accepted!! This is going to be a GREAT education for Ben (paid for by the district I might add!) as he is bored beyond belief with 'regular' school. Paige was in the public school system up to and including 3rd grade and she too was bored out of her mind. NOW she is challenged and using her brain and LOVING school (she is in 4th grade, but skipped 4th and 5th grade math..is doing college entrance spelling tests etc). Bens teacher (who also taught Paige for 1st and 2nd grade) said that while she thought Paige was smart and gifted, she sees even MORE of that in Ben.
So now you know the story..let me get to the title of my blog (at long last right? lol). I had someone say to me after I'd told them Ben had also gotten into this program "Hey Congrats! Way to Go! You and Mark have done a great job!". And while I said 'Thanks!' I had mixed feelings...yes, we DO do a great job of parenting (I think! lol)...we are involved with our kids, we go to all their 'events', we take them everywhere and talk to them like intelligent people (we've never 'dumbed' down our language for them)...also, there is a great gene pool to work with. Marks side of the family has most of the kids in gifted programs or advanced programs. Mark is brilliant himself. My brother is a bona fide genius. I mean REALLY..a REAL genuis. And while my biological father is a whole other story, he too I believe has 'giftedness' in his brain. So our kids also came from a great gene pool that apparently gets pretty deep when Mark and I mix those genes! lolol...
But I also thought to myself.....it really isn't ME...or MARK...after all, we have three other kids between us who while EXTREMELY smart and talented, aren't 'gifted'. I think it was just a good combination of Mark and I and a family history of good smart genes and a whole host of other small things that all added up let us hit the genetic crap shoot twice...So while I'd LIKE to take the credit..I only carried them in my body..I've only helped to raise them. God made them. He connected all their dots and made them who they are. Mark and I have merely been blessed to have them on loan for awhile.
But I'm am still darn proud....even if the sun DOESN'T really rise and set out of their asses! :)
Hugs to all,
Jaye
Tuesday, June 09, 2009
Blog Challenge
There is a blogger in Australia who is challenging bloggers to do the below three lists. I actually read about this on a 'blogger friends' blog! So, here goes! :)
My three lists of 8. Or 'My 3x8'.
8 Things I look forward to.
The first Christmas card of the season. I EAGERLY wait to see who's will be first!
Marks submarine coming home when he is gone.
The first snowfall of winter.
My best friends phone calls.
My trip to WI this summer.
Post Secret every Sunday.
Sams high school graduation this Friday (yikes!)
The day Marks ex wife receives her last child support payment...that will mean we no longer have to deal with HER!....
8 things I did yesterday
Daycare
wrote a bday card to my brother
Hugged my kids
Made GREAT meatballs and pasta for dinner
Worked out in the yard with Mark in the cool air of the evening
read another chapter in my book
had a fight with Sam...sigh
made good eating choices
8 Things I wish I could do
Reach my goal of going to law school!
Write a book
lose ten pounds
have a relationship with my mom
go on a trip with Mark without KIDS
reach Shelbys heart so she'd know we really do care and we really DO know what she is going through...
flood cookies
be 4 inches taller
And there you have it! So lets hear YOUR 3.8!
Hugs to all,
Jaye
My three lists of 8. Or 'My 3x8'.
8 Things I look forward to.
The first Christmas card of the season. I EAGERLY wait to see who's will be first!
Marks submarine coming home when he is gone.
The first snowfall of winter.
My best friends phone calls.
My trip to WI this summer.
Post Secret every Sunday.
Sams high school graduation this Friday (yikes!)
The day Marks ex wife receives her last child support payment...that will mean we no longer have to deal with HER!....
8 things I did yesterday
Daycare
wrote a bday card to my brother
Hugged my kids
Made GREAT meatballs and pasta for dinner
Worked out in the yard with Mark in the cool air of the evening
read another chapter in my book
had a fight with Sam...sigh
made good eating choices
8 Things I wish I could do
Reach my goal of going to law school!
Write a book
lose ten pounds
have a relationship with my mom
go on a trip with Mark without KIDS
reach Shelbys heart so she'd know we really do care and we really DO know what she is going through...
flood cookies
be 4 inches taller
And there you have it! So lets hear YOUR 3.8!
Hugs to all,
Jaye
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