Happy Mothers Day to all those out there who are mothers. By biology...or adoption...or the men who have had to step up and be a mother....or those who are parenting their children's children. Mothering is not simply an act of giving birth - it is so much more....... and so there is this day set aside to honour our mothers.
And every year I would get my feelings hurt when Mothers Day didn't go as I pictured it 'should be'. Oh, I would get some Hallmark cards and maybe a gift or two...but basically, mothers day still involved me doing laundry..and cooking...and cleaning..and really getting pissed off that I was 'not appreciated around here'. And then one day I had an AHA moment. It was MOTHERS Day....I was a MOTHER. This day was for me to do whatever I wanted to do - not a day for me to create a vision of what I wanted.......and so I started a tradition with my best friend.
We get up early, we hit Starbucks and grab a coffee, then we get on the ferry and spend the day in Seattle at Pike Place Market. We go to all of our favourite shops - we start with breakfast at Le Panier - a true french bakery, where we have a jambon morney. This little creation is too heavenly to describe to do it justice. Suffice it to say that it is layer upon layer of flaky pastry that surrounds thin slices of ham and Swiss cheese all baked in buttery goodness. A good start to a day created to celebrate all that I do as a mum yes?
We then hit Sur la Table for all of our dreamy kitchen gadgets and where we each buy ourselves a nice little something that we have dreamed of having in our kitchens - we are both foodies after all! This year I bought myself four mini fluted pans. Perfect for mini quiches, or fruit tarts....or simply to look at and sigh. I also bought dill pickle popcorn seasoning as a fun thing to put on our popcorn (we all love dill pickle chips, so maybe dill pickle popcorn?).
Then we hit Giada de Laurentiis's family market. If you do not know who she is, check her out on food network. She is a sweetheart of an Italian chef who makes cooking look easy..and who gives us inspiration for our own family meals. This year I bought some delicious looking 'real' Italian egg noodles for some pasta dish I shall make, and some authentic pepperoni sausages for Mark - love a man who loves his meat (and I shall not go any further with THAT topic!)
After those three stops, we simply wander the market. The cacophony of sounds and sights is enough to fill up one's senses. I have always said that I am not a crafty person. But I do have an 'art' form that I indulge in and that is cooking and baking. The creativity that surrounds a good meal is soothing to my soul, and so a whole market dedicated to fresh, whole, seasonal food is just what I need to fill up my soul. We always find a fun place for lunch - this year it was a hole in the wall place that served up fantastic sandwiches on ciabatta bread that we ate at a tin table on a cobblestone alley.
It is a day of girlfriends bonding, of good food being eaten, of ideas being added to our 'art form'.....we collect spices, recipes, and pantry basics to create meals for the months to come. This day has become a gift that I give myself. I spend quality, uninterrupted time with my bestie, and I get to visit all the shops that really call to me.
And most importantly, I have taken the pressure off of my husband and children. Mothers Day is now perfect. It is EXACTLY as I envision it, because I make it happen - I create it. And know what? The cards I get and what is written in them have become more personal since I have taken the pressure off of them. Why should they have to be mind readers and fulfill my idea of a perfect mothers day? That is not their job. Just as my happiness is not their job. Happiness is an internal thing - something I must find within myself. And so Mothers Day is now the same thing - it has become something I allow myself to acknowledge within myself. Instead of expecting others to tell me that I am a great mum and am appreciated, I allow myself to say that. I am a GOOD mum. I am appreciated. And I celebrate that by doing what I want to do for this entire day.
And so I come home at the end of this day and throw on a load of laundry. And maybe I cook some dinner. But do you know what? It doesn't matter, because this day was PERFECT. From the cards full of genuine words of love and adoration from my husband and children, to the exquisite gift they chose for me, to the day spent with the best friend a girl could have........
So my words to you mums out there are simply this: Mothers Day is YOUR day. Don't expect others to make it perfect, YOU need to make it what YOU envision. Take this one day to focus on yourself. After all, a mother who appreciates herself? Well, she is a better mother and is appreciated by all. Trust me. I have learned this lesson the hard way. I am blessed and loved and appreciated. But I couldn't see it until I acknowledged it myself.
Hugs to you all,
Jaye
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